Teddi Mellencamp is opening up about battling stage 4 brain and lung cancer.
The reality star became emotional while detailing how the disease is affecting all aspects of her life, including motherhood.
“I remember one day in the hospital I was like, ‘I feel like today might be Dove’s birthday,’” Mellencamp, 43, who shares the five year old along with Slate, 12, and Cruz, 10, with estranged husband Edwin Arroyave, told Entertainment Tonight on Thursday.
“And Edwin’s like, ‘It is. It’s her party today that you planned.’ I was like, ‘Can they please just let me out for today?’”
Mellencamp recounted how Arroyave’s response was “exactly what I needed him to say.”
“He’s like, ‘We’ll throw another one,’” she told the outlet. “But my heart broke because I’m wondering, ‘Will she remember that I wasn’t there?’”
“I’m like, ‘I don’t think you understand the debilitating pain that I feel some days thinking about the fact that…my kids,’” Mellencamp shared through tears.
“That is extremely frightening. My kids are young,” the podcast host said at the prospect of leaving her kids motherless.
Mellencamp also clarified her previous comments about how her dad, John Mellencamp, was planning her burial amid her cancer battle.
“We were totally joking about the conversation,” the “RHOBH” alum explained. “I would say there’s definitely been hard conversations, the hardest being if things go wrong, who’s gonna be the person in charge of making those decisions? And those are things nobody wants to think about, but I do. And the way that I get through it is by laughing.”
Earlier this month, Mellencamp said on her “Two Ts in a Pod” podcast that the rock star, 73, called her “11 times in a row” to discuss how he was already planning her burial in their family mausoleum in Indiana.
“Finally, I answer, I’m like, ‘I’m in the bath. Let me live a little,’” the equestrian detailed. “He goes, ‘I just want to make sure you’re going to be in our group family mausoleum.’”
Mellencamp admitted to her co-host Tamra Judge that she did agree to her dad’s request, jokingly adding that she wants to have “hot girls never die” engraved on her tombstone.
Mellencamp also addressed how she is feeling these days to ET, stating, “I would say that today, I’m doing well. I’ve learned that it’s okay to be like, ‘I’m tired,’ and listen to my body.”
On April 10, Mellencamp revealed that her doctors had given her a 50/50 chance of beating cancer.
“It’s one of my favorite things to ask is: ‘How long I got? What are my chances?’” she said on “Nightline.” “And they often say ’50/50.’”
Mellencamp has brought her Instagram followers along for the journey, sharing pictures of her before and after her diagnosis.
“What a difference 4 months makes,” Mellencamp wrote on the social media platform beneath photos of herself. “Sometimes I am so focused on ‘being strong’ that I forget I am allowed to be sad, cry it out, and feel very alone. I love my kids, friends, and family so much and am forever grateful to them but dang today is one of those days.”
She added, “If you are having a day where you can’t wait for it to be bedtime so you can start over tomorrow leave me a ❤️. We are not alone. PS. I have watched Netflix and Hulu, what do I watch next?#overyoucancer.”
[Notigroup Newsroom in collaboration with other media outlets, with information from the following sources]
